Free: Contests & Raffles.
Even Amazon has some
Since it is so short of notice and time sensitive, why not drive around and get a road kill squirrel. Set it up how you want it with a card saying something like- My friend, I went out and harvested this B&C squirrel in honor of your birthday. I hope you appreciate all the effort that went into this gift and remember that it was given with love. As you and I have slightly different tastes, I will let you take care of all the mounting process in the pose of your choice. Enjoy this trophy and remember me when you gaze upon it. Or something like that, you did say it was kind of a joke gift ? I know my buds would get a kick out of it and It would be a gift never forgotten