backing out

[Mossy]

So I've bow hunted by myself for the past 4 years or so but a buddy from work wanted to hunt with me this year so i bought a modern tag for elk.  We've scouted a little, sighted in our rifles and bought maps for a few spots.  I called him a couple days ago to recheck our guns and maps but he says, "Oh, a buddy of mine was talking to his grandfather and he's going to let us hunt his property".  So of course I was excited but then he says only him and his buddy can go.  WTH?  No sorry, no let me talk him into letting you go too, no "I already have plans".  Pretty pissed.  I know I wouldn't back out on hunting plans.  That's one of the reasons I started hunting by myself, too many disappointments from others.  What would you guys do? think?

[BLKBEARKLR]

So I've bow hunted by myself for the past 4 years or so but a buddy from work wanted to hunt with me this year so i bought a modern tag for elk.  We've scouted a little, sighted in our rifles and bought maps for a few spots.  I called him a couple days ago to recheck our guns and maps but he says, "Oh, a buddy of mine was talking to his grandfather and he's going to let us hunt his property".  So of course I was excited but then he says only him and his buddy can go.  WTH?  No sorry, no let me talk him into letting you go too, no "I already have plans".  Pretty pissed.  I know I wouldn't back out on hunting plans.  That's one of the reasons I started hunting by myself, too many disappointments from others.  What would you guys do? think?

I hunt with two people - the wife and my one and only hunting partner. We never change plans. That is why I stopped hunting with other people. You get things wired in and next thing you know it has changed.

I did this year have a blast with Ranger from this site though. We both went antelope hunting on the spur of the moment. 

Joe

[ribka]

I always plan on hunting by myself and if i have company that is ok. But always plan on my own. Too many flaky people.

[Hyde]

That's just wrong.  A little "guilt soup" is in order for this guy.  His lack of concern or apology tells me he doesn't think he did anything wrong.  He needs to know what he did is BS.  Of course... wait until after the season in case he is in fact working on getting you in. 

[ser300wsm]

  Sorry to hear about that.. What kind of a FRIEND is he really ?

[scoyoc5]

thats not cool...

[STIKNSTRINGBOW]

I always plan on hunting by myself and if i have company that is ok. But always plan on my own. Too many flaky people.

That is how I hunt now too, it is hard to find a reliable partner.

[bobcat]

He wouldn't be my friend anymore, that's for sure.

[FWilliams]

that sucks , I been there a few times over the years, count your blessings now that you have found out he is a flake , before you were in a situation where you really needed him.......I have one guy I hunt with that I would trust my life with,period.  if we have company  thats cool.

[Mossy]

Sorry to hear about that.. What kind of a FRIEND is he really ?

Just a buddy from work.  We shoot quite a bit together, been on a half ass bear hunt and gone fishing a couple times.  I'm a pretty good judge of character and figured he'd be reliable.  I just wish it wasn't so close to season.  Should have made him buy a bow then I wouldn't have to worry.

[Mossy]

And by the way, I'm not looking for an area to hunt but I appreciate the pm's. Just wanted to hear your opinions.

[Hornseeker]

LAME! If it was my good friend/hunting partner (or anyone for that matter) I would expect them to come to me when they heard about the private and say, "Hey, I have this great opportunity that just came up to hunt some private where there are tons of  big bulls.... is it going to screw you up if I hunt there and you aren't allowed to?"

At which point I would tell him, "hell no, go for it"..

But, if it went down like you just explained...I wouldn't talk to him much anymore.

[billythekidrock]

LAME! If it was my good friend/hunting partner (or anyone for that matter) I would expect them to come to me when they heard about the private and say, "Hey, I have this great opportunity that just came up to hunt some private where there are tons of  big bulls.... is it going to screw you up if I hunt there and you aren't allowed to?"

At which point I would tell him, "hell no, go for it"..

But, if it went down like you just explained...I wouldn't talk to him much anymore.

[butcher98951]

yep i hunt with my brother and 10 year old daughter, plans never change and up for anything..

[sprungnoggin]

LAME! If it was my good friend/hunting partner (or anyone for that matter) I would expect them to come to me when they heard about the private and say, "Hey, I have this great opportunity that just came up to hunt some private where there are tons of  big bulls.... is it going to screw you up if I hunt there and you aren't allowed to?"

At which point I would tell him, "hell no, go for it"..

But, if it went down like you just explained...I wouldn't talk to him much anymore.

This!

[Skinnyman]

I always plan on hunting by myself and if i have company that is ok. But always plan on my own. Too many flaky people.

I always plan on hunting alone. I invite some people to join me, but I know that they will flake out on me. Not sure why, but thats the way it always ends up. I always go deer hunting with the same people, but elk is a different story - no one goes. 

So I just hunt alone, much easier to plan too!!! No one else to accomodate.

I do understand why the landowner only wants people he knows to hunt it, and only wants a limited # of people there. There are a lot of unethical and unsafe hunters out there. Not saying any of you are that way, but the owner has no way of knowing that.

[wildmanoutdoors]

Im with skinny and allot of others. I plan my hunt, invite my hunting buds and if they make it fine. I still hunt alone. So really there just camping friends.

[Todd_ID]

I get friends backing out quite a bit, but it's the other way around.  I always take a ton of time off for hunting, but everybody else just tries to fit it in when they can get off work or when the wife will let them go.  For this reason I am the one setting when and where the hunting will take place.  If somebody decides the wife takes priority, then I'm not up a creek.

[BlackRidge]

LAME! If it was my good friend/hunting partner (or anyone for that matter) I would expect them to come to me when they heard about the private and say, "Hey, I have this great opportunity that just came up to hunt some private where there are tons of  big bulls.... is it going to screw you up if I hunt there and you aren't allowed to?"

At which point I would tell him, "hell no, go for it"..

But, if it went down like you just explained...I wouldn't talk to him much anymore.

Well put, couldn't agree more

[markts]

LAME! If it was my good friend/hunting partner (or anyone for that matter) I would expect them to come to me when they heard about the private and say, "Hey, I have this great opportunity that just came up to hunt some private where there are tons of  big bulls.... is it going to screw you up if I hunt there and you aren't allowed to?"

At which point I would tell him, "hell no, go for it"..

But, if it went down like you just explained...I wouldn't talk to him much anymore.

My thoughts exactly-I was set to hunt with one of my buddies a couple of years ago and got a call afew days before the opener from another bud who just got some private land to hunt. Went and talked with buddy #one and he said go for it-I got a bull and all was good

[Widgeondeke]

Not cool at all. Just like many others have said. 1 good friend, my brother & kids; thats all I plan on. Any extras are just that extra company. Can live without them if they flake.

[turkeydancer]

Been there ... done that ... got the t-shirt.  

I just would let it slide as far as everyday at work, but to any of his future inquiries my response to him would be "Sorry got other plans" (or " got my own opportunity this year") !  

It's sort of like the buddy that always wants to hunt with you, but only when he finds out you got drawn for that very special "sure thing" permit hunt ... nope, sorry, too late, too bad, so sad.  

[rasbo]

good partners are hard to find,sounds like ya need to keep looking..I have met a few on here,and have been quite happy they will hunt with me..Met some that are negatory..there is always some disappointments with everyone, sometimes things come up,myself included.Shat happens...weigh it out and decide..I wouldn't breakup with him over the phone though..face to face

[Bean Counter]

I just would let it slide as far as everyday at work, but to any of his future inquiries my response to him would be "Sorry got other plans" (or " got my own opportunity this year") !  

  Take the high road and don't turn it into bitchy gossip. In some professional settings this goes without saying but I don't know what type of environment you work in (and don't need to know). I'm can endorse "I got other plans" but don't lie or make excuses. In fact, if he presses and wants to know why he no longer has a shooting buddy, tell him gently but firmly how much you were disappointed. Everything you wrote in your OP makes sense to any decent person.  

[Little Fish]

I think your buddy is a loser....probably better that you don't have him around as a hunting partner. What happens if you are way back and in deep and you break a leg and you don't meet up at the designated time and place. Do you want to be relying on someone like that? I'd drop him as a hunting partner and leave it as he's a casual friend. Life is too short to waste time on flakes.

[Wile E. Hunter]

I had a similar situation. Year before last a hunting partner of mine canceled at the last minute for our elk hunt. He'd flaked out on me on several upland game, varmint, and waterfowl hunts, but the elk hunt was the last straw. Thing about elk hunting is that given where it takes place, and what it is, it can get dangerous, not to mention the work of getting an animal out should you get one. I found myself "kind of hoping" I wouldn't score in some of the holes I hunted by myself because of how hellish it would've been getting an animal out by myself (what the hell kind of elk hunt is it that you hope you WON'T score!?!?). By the way, this was and Idaho Elk hunt, and I'd already bought my license and tag ($600) so I was pretty well committed.

Since then he still mentions hunting together but I'll have no part of it. Hunting partners form an important part of our lives because for one thing we may come to rely on them for our lives, but mostly because they share in something that's very deeply important to us. He broke the bond, and I'll not hunt with him again. I no longer respect him. I have to respect someone to consider them a friend, even more so a hunting partner. I'm much tighter with my hunting partners than other friends.

Wile E.

[Tony 270]

That's messed up to just bail on you last moment, especially after getting a rifle tag when you otherwise would have gone bow - just so you two could hunt together. When was he going to tell you, the night before opening day?

[k_rex]

I'd be setting up plans solo from now on.  If a worthy partner comes along then thats great.


I have very few issues with this since I hunt with family or by myself.

[bankwalker]

same thing happened to me last year. my own uncle was the one who backed out on me. he talked me into hunting modern firearm elk for the first time, then backed out the week before the season
i tried to get something setup with a forum member but never could get a solid plan set with my money situation at the time keeping me from going.

i hunt alone aswell. it is just far easier that way

[Mossy]

funny...he called me this morning and apologized, maybe he found this site.   Looks like it's a done deal on his end but I might be able to scrounge something up with my future father in law even though he wasn't planning on hunting this year. 

[Bean Counter]

If he sincerely apologized, then do YOURSELF a favor and forgive him.

That still doesn't mean you need to hunt with him again. He needs to rebuild credibility by being a consistent man of his word.

[Bean Counter]

 .

[sivart33]

i don't like to hunt with people, i have in the past never had a down side, but more conformable with no one else.  only you can mess something up not anyone else to blame. 

Forgive your friend,  friends are more important then hunting.   Is hunting going to bail you out of jail, or give you a place to stay if needed, drive you home from a bar if you got way to drunk. 

[billythekidrock]

i don't like to hunt with people, i have in the past never had a down side, but more conformable with no one else.  only you can mess something up not anyone else to blame. 

Yep, been knocked off my game a few times by hunting with people.  Even when hunting with experienced and successful hunters it can be easy to lose focus.

[tshoote30]

i don't like to hunt with people, i have in the past never had a down side, but more conformable with no one else.  only you can mess something up not anyone else to blame. 

Yep, been knocked off my game a few times by hunting with people.  Even when hunting with experienced and successful hunters it can be easy to lose focus.

Yea hard to swallow but friends are friends if he is a friend that you cherish and know that he would do for you as you would do for him.. hunting is hunting and family and friends that are worth it, are not replaceable. i hope you are able to find a great hunt this year considering the situation. if you were close to me I would invite you to join us. Good luck....

[6x6rack]

I hope you have a killer hunt, get to show your buddy lots of pictures when you get back to work and think fondly of your last BBQ elk burger every time he complains about tag soup! Good Luck!

[Mossy]

Well it looks like things might work out after all.  He's definately going to ditch me and my future father in law's back up plan didn't pan out either but I'm at least going to be able to get out on a 4 day trip with a couple other guys from work.  Kind of last minute, I've never hunted that area but one of the guys has for bear and has seen sign in the past. The best part is the guy I sold my trailer to earlier this year offered to let me use it next week.  I'm still pretty bummed but trying to see the bright side.

[HuntingFanatic]

Ive found the bright side is the best side! Good luck! Knock one down!

[coachcw]

Thats BS no doubt. I have one buddy thats always game , that being said I always plan my trip and set the dates , and have enough gear incase someone backs out . some times hunting by yourself is a great time to reflect on things . oh yeah have a kid you can always drag them along my sons 16 now and turning into a good pack mule.