A short deers hunting check list.
OK, there is a list on
http://www.muleymadness.com/other/checklist.php that is actually pretty darn complete, but 50 years of deers huntin has given me the insight to make a few additions, here is what I recommend:
1. Beer. Take plenty of beer. With global warming upon us, you just can't have too much!
2. Spare gas. On a normal deers hunt, I've been know to run through 100-200 gals. Of course I am old school and still drive a big old pickup to do my day-to-day huntin. You might cut down on that figure ifin you dive an ATV.
3. Extra condoms. I always keep one on the end of the barrel of the gun. Not that you're going to get any rain or anything like that down the barrel beins you're mostly in the truck, but those rough roads can make a guy spill his beer from time to time.
4. A good pair of really dark sunglasses. Not only will they help with that God awful bright morning sun, but will cosmetically improve your appearance over those enlarged eyeball blood vessels that you get every year up deers huntin...I am sure it's allergies.
5. A Briggs and Stratton 8 ˝ hp generator. Those fancy quiet running jobs they been bringin' in from foreign countries...they're just downright un-American. Besides that, it takes bookoo power ta keep that much beer cold. A lot of times I've had to let that bad boy run all night or else risk warm beer in the mornin!
6. Plenty of ammo. Once you get camp set up, ya still got ta get old Betsey sighted in. Don't worry about targets, should be enough empty cans laying around camp to sight in all the guns in Sherman's army.
7. Your 9mm. Nothing better than running through four or five boxes of ammo while your sitting around camp trying to figure out which road to try later on this evenin. Here again, should be plenty of cans for plinkin at.
8. Lots of Chili and beans. Might be the only time you'll get to “not” notice the effects of ten grown men with a gut full of beans, given the fact you're sleeping off the effects of the beer chasers.
9. And last but not least, your brother-in-law. While the two of you are sittin around the campfire loudly singing good old bawdy songs, there's a good chance he'll forgive you once and for all for defiling his little sister before ya married her, low, those many years ago.
